Really baby?

A letter for Phyllis/Tammy Wynette/Damascus Pinkerton/TamDam:

OK baby. You win. You've gotten under my skin. Both figuratively and literally. I've been so patient, so calm waiting for you. Now all of my carefully constructed cool demeanor is falling apart. Why are you toying with me? Just come out of there!

Is this your first practical joke? Ha ha, I'll fool mom into thinking she could need an induction... Well it's not funny. I'm suddenly nervous about this whole birthing thing. See what you've done! Just come out!

Daddy and I spent yesterday decorating the house, making it cozy and holiday style just for you. We have pretty lights and stockings. Once you come out we're also going to get you a beautiful tree that will smell wonderful. You can help me decorate the tree and that way you'll be close enough to see it with your newborn eyes. As a special bonus, Dan looks especially handsome when lit by Christmas lights. You'll see once you come out of me!

So baby, what I'm trying to say is that I'm really excited to meet you and I love you so much already, it's hard to imagine how much more once I can see your sweet face. Please make your move. Please come out of me. Let's get this thing going.

Can't wait to meet you,
Mommy